Joke - F#*@ a duck

[Tazza]

I swiped this off another forum.
A duck walks into a pub and says to the barman: "Got any bread?"

Barman says: "No."

Duck says: "Got any bread?" Barman says: "No."

Duck says: "Got any bread?" Barman says: "No, we have no bread."

Duck says: "Got any bread?" Barman says: "No, we haven't got any
f*#@ing bread."

Duck says: "Got any bread?" Barman says: "No, are you deaf, we
haven't got any f*#@ing bread, ask me again and I'll nail your
f*#@ing beak to the bar you f*#@ing irritating bloody bird!"

Duck says: "Got any nails?"

Barman says: "No."

Duck says: "Got any bread?

 

[Tigerotor77W]

Hahaha, nice! I don't know if I would have that type of attitude as a duck, though -- my neck would be pretttty vulnerable.

To hijack (add? ) to this thread, here's a briefing about Jack Bauer (from the TV series in the USA -- maybe it's elsewhere, also? -- 24)

"On 24, Jack Bauer averages 6 people killed per hour, times 24 hours, that's 144 individuals killed by Jack in a single day.

Figuring that under normal conditions, he gets a good night's sleep, that cuts his average total kills to only 96 per day. That's 35,086 people a year. I'm willing to deduct another 10,848 for weekends and holidays.

Still, it is reasonable to expect Jack Bauer to kill 24,238 people a year by even the most conservative estimates. In a normal 40-year career, he will have personally killed almost a million people before retirement.

If you figure a bullet cost 45 cents, and he shoots at least 3 bullets at everybody he kills, thats a total investment of $1,308,852 back into the economy over the course of his career on ammo alone..."

-- anonymous author

 

[Tazza]

Hahaha, nice! I don't know if I would have that type of attitude as a duck, though -- my neck would be pretttty vulnerable.

To hijack (add? ) to this thread, here's a briefing about Jack Bauer (from the TV series in the USA -- maybe it's elsewhere, also? -- 24)

"On 24, Jack Bauer averages 6 people killed per hour, times 24 hours, that's 144 individuals killed by Jack in a single day.

Figuring that under normal conditions, he gets a good night's sleep, that cuts his average total kills to only 96 per day. That's 35,086 people a year. I'm willing to deduct another 10,848 for weekends and holidays.

Still, it is reasonable to expect Jack Bauer to kill 24,238 people a year by even the most conservative estimates. In a normal 40-year career, he will have personally killed almost a million people before retirement.

If you figure a bullet cost 45 cents, and he shoots at least 3 bullets at everybody he kills, thats a total investment of $1,308,852 back into the economy over the course of his career on ammo alone..."

-- anonymous author

hehehe nice, an actors job is never done.